Let the revenue streams flow

An Open Letter to Governor Perdue

Dear Governor Perdue,

Please consider my application to fill one of the vacancies on the State Alcohol and Beverage Control Board. It is clear I am a highly qualified to be appointed to a position on this board. I drink, and have been a drinker most of my adult life. I perfected my drinking skills while serving in the U.S. Air Force.

In these dire economic times, it is important for the State to have as many revenue streams flowing as possible. The backlog of requests to build new ABC Stores is damming up those streams, and must be cleared quickly.

Since I live in Cary I can report to work immediately upon appointment and work for as long as is needed. It is vitally important that we begin work immediately, so that the State can begin collecting revenue for alcohol sales and taxes, and law enforcement authorities can begin collecting fines for DUIs.

I await your pleasure.

Sincerely,

Brian “I’m Only Here for the Beer” Irving